What does it mean to feel alive at work?

When I think broadly about the workplace and corporate cultures, the first word that comes to mind isn’t usually “best friend.” Deficit mindsets and a focus on colleagues as competition don’t always reiterate the value and role that the friends we work with play in shaping our experience, how we show up, and our impact.

As I was examining the intersection of social belonging, mental well-being, and courageous imagination in preparation to speak at the 2022 Imaginator Summit hosted by CU Denver's Imaginator Academy in Denver, CO, I read that, according to Gallup, only 3 in 10 people report having a best friend at work. (Harvard Business Review) They note, “Consistently talking about best friends at work makes relationships part of how we do things around here -- in other words, part of the work culture.”

Only 3 in 10 people report having a best friend at work.

I don’t think we all need to have a best friend at work to accomplish a job well done, but I know it can impact how we show up in the workplace, how we contribute, our sense of belonging, and our social and mental well-being over time.

I was recently in Orlando, FL, where Hannah Drake (IDEAS xLab's Chief Creative Officer), my husband, Theo Edmonds (CU Denver's Imaginator Academy), and I were all speaking at the Creating Healthy Communities Convening. Hannah and I were saying one night over dinner that we no longer have the right language to describe our relationship. It’s more than friends and more than colleagues at IDEAS xLab; it’s something more profound, significant, and impactful; it’s where 1+1=3.

During the Out & Equal 2022 Workplace Summit, I heard a quote by Dr. Bertice Berry that really summed it up.

“When you move with purpose, you collide with destiny.”

Our collective journeys together from Louisville to Senegal and beyond, the willingness to be vulnerable and to learn together about what we don’t know, and to find new ways to support and uplift each other all reinforce what Dan Cable refers to as the role of the "best self" at work.

In his book Alive at Work, Cable writes that companies should focus on onboarding an employee’s best self. He reiterates that our “best self” is just a story we tell ourselves and can directly shape our contributions and productivity at work. These stories can include our purpose and connection to the company's goals, the value we bring and what parts of ourselves we share, our self-efficacy, the work we are doing, and our feelings of connection with colleagues.

If we change the story we tell ourselves, we change our behaviors.

The flip side of our best self being present is what US Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthy talked about during the 2022 Concordia America’s Summit, including the negative impact of loneliness on people’s creativity, productivity, performance at work, and overall retention of the workforce. Murthy noted that feeling lonely can negatively impact the people around us.

In Gallup’s State of the Global Workplace: 2022 report, they found that:

• 60% of people reported being emotionally detached at work

• 19% reported being miserable

• Only 21% of respondents reported feeling engaged — which is even lower than in 2020

• 33% of employees are thriving in their overall well-being.

Think about those statistics for a minute. We've talked about covering, coping, and burnout in my past few newsletters. I see a direct link between the environment that's created when we have "best friends" at work (impacting our sense of belonging) and can be our "best self" (when we don't have to cover) and what can happen when those elements don't exist.

Since our launch almost a decade ago, our team and culture at IDEAS xLab have continued to evolve. We remain focused on mental and emotional wellbeing, questioning our “best self” narratives and building connections with a sense of belonging that makes our work possible and impactful. It has shaped our organization and allowed us to grow and engage partners and clients through comprehensive and inclusive approaches as we each uncover and imagine new ways to work and live.

How do these areas resonate with you?

Do you have a best friend (or friends) at work? How does it impact your connection to the company and what you do?

Are you showing up as your "best self" at work and with your team? If not, what is the story you're telling yourself, and are there opportunities to rewrite it?

When you look at the stats from Gallup, which responses resonate with you? Do you feel emotionally detached, miserable, engaged, or thriving?

Feel free to share your thoughts, questions, and responses in the comments, send me a DM, or email me at connect@joshmiller.ventures

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About: Josh Miller is a queer changemaker, public speaker, photographer, and outdoor explorer. He is the owner of Josh Miller Ventures and the co-founder + CEO of IDEAS xLab—an organization that uses the art of storytelling and community collaboration to impact public health. Miller’s work has been featured by The New York Times, the Aspen Institute, and the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation. He is a Soros Equality Fellow, received the 2022 Nonprofit Visionary Leader Award from Louisville Business First, and was selected for Business Equality Magazine’s Forty LGBTQ+ Leaders under 40 and Louisville Business First's Forty under 40. Miller is a two-time TEDx speaker and has been described as a "force in our community.” He holds an MBA from Indiana University and an undergraduate degree from Bellarmine University. Previously, he served as an advisor to the Derby Diversity & Business Summit and co-chair for the Louisville Health advisory board’s communications committee. 

The cost of burnout.

Over the past few years, I’ve thought a lot about the intersection of covering, coping, and burnout. This intersection was brought further into focus with how many people experienced the disruption of COVID-19 and changes brought on by the socio-political environment and push for racial justice.

Today, I want to focus on burnout.

When my husband Theo and I were in Berlin in early 2022, he found the book The Happiness of Burnout at an art museum. It’s the case study of an artist’s life – one who built a name and career for themselves and then burned out and worked to find their way back, with boundaries and new ways of working.

There is a quote by psychotherapist Dina Glauber that resonated with me.

"When we burnout, it is our old personality that burns itself out. It is our old way of living that turns into ashes. It becomes evident that a new style of life is necessary. The self needs to be better cultivated. Burnout is the last form of resistance. The body collapses."

Whether it’s been work or other life events, I think most of us can relate to this feeling. There are times and situations that we cannot push through. Where we mentally or physically collapse. We recognize that a new way of being – finding harmony – is necessary.

During a recent talk I gave for the Colorado Culture First community, I asked participants how *covering made them feel. “Inauthentic, Fake, Exhausted” were a few of their responses.

They were the type of responses and feelings that lead to burnout. It is a cyclical process with covering, coping, and burnout slowly impacting each other over time. Sometimes the cumulative impact can take years to identify.

Burnout can range from low energy and exhaustion to disengagement and even quitting to find something more fulfilling – like what we’ve seen through the great resignation.

And, just like covering can negatively impact a person’s capacity to contribute at work and their mental and emotional well-being, there are costs to burnout.

The World Economic Forum estimates burnout’s global cost to be $322 billion. 

We also know that burnout isn’t only impacting frontline employees and middle management but the c-suite as well. And it’s estimated that burnout can generate a loss to a company of 34% of someone’s salary annually if that employee feels burned out.

So, how do we prevent and mitigate burnout within ourselves and with others?

• Laura Campbell of InspireCorps said that one of the prompts they use is to ask people, “What do you need to be at your best?”

• Harvard Business Review notes, "Situational factors are the biggest contributors to burnout, so changes at the job, team, or organizational level are often required to address all the underlying issues."

• University of Colorado Denver’s Imaginator Academy takes a cultural analytics approach, looking at how factors including hope, trust, and belonging impact people’s experience in the workplace.

• One of the things I recommend asking yourself and your team/leadership is, "Are there cultural norms and expectations that may be contributing to covering in our workplace that could lead to burnout?"

Within our organization, we encourage people to unplug and take personal time to recharge. My colleague texted me on the first summer vacation day and asked, “Are you working?” It was a friendly reminder – GO OUT AND EXPERIENCE THE WORLD!

We’re also cognizant of moving meetings or deadlines when the team feels depleted.

It’s when you can talk openly about how schedules, travel and world and life events are impacting you that you can find a way of working together to prevent burnout from impacting what you’re able to accomplish.

Do you have an experience with burnout or processes that you and your team use to prevent burnout from impacting your company? Add it in the comments or send me an email at connect@joshmiller.ventures

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Covering – when we downplay, hide or filter parts of ourselves at work, with different social groups, at school, or with family. [Read more here]

Coping - adjusting to or tolerating adverse events or realities while trying to keep your positive self-image and emotional equilibrium (Cleveland Clinic). This can include self-isolation, self-soothing, use of social media, and searching out external support. [Read more here]

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About: Josh Miller is a queer changemaker, public speaker, photographer, and outdoor explorer. He is the owner of Josh Miller Ventures and the co-founder + CEO of IDEAS xLab—an organization that uses the art of storytelling and community collaboration to impact public health. Miller’s work has been featured by The New York Times, the Aspen Institute, and the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation. He is a Soros Equality Fellow, received the 2022 Nonprofit Visionary Leader Award from Louisville Business First, and was selected for Business Equality Magazine’s Forty LGBTQ+ Leaders under 40 and Louisville Business First's Forty under 40. Miller is a two-time TEDx speaker and has been described as a "force in our community.” He holds an MBA from Indiana University and an undergraduate degree from Bellarmine University. Previously, he served as an advisor to the Derby Diversity & Business Summit and co-chair for the Louisville Health advisory board’s communications committee. 

The Cumulative Impact of Covering and Coping

What can happen when we cover parts of ourselves at work and in life?

It can lead to increased stress, anxiety, and exhaustion and decrease our ability to lead, contribute at work, make decisions, innovate and think creatively. It can weigh on our minds and distract us from the meaningful work we want and need to accomplish.

Covering can also trigger the use of coping mechanisms to deal with its impact, especially over the long term.

Cleveland Clinic says, “Coping usually involves adjusting to or tolerating negative events or realities while you try to keep your positive self-image and emotional equilibrium. Coping… may be cumulative and profound.”

Coping mechanisms can range from self-soothing to self-isolation, using social media, or searching out external support.

Starting in high school, I began using alcohol as my coping mechanism of choice. Being outed gay before my junior year, I drank heavily to deal with the situation I found myself in - a conservative Christian community and household that viewed my “lifestyle choice as a sin.” For example, I kept a handle of vodka in my jeans drawer, taking shots before dinner with my family to hide how I was feeling.

I started wearing makeup my senior year of high school after I moved in with my aunt and cousins in Indiana and wore a mix of men’s and women’s clothing. For years I looked in the mirror and saw a beautiful, androgynous man, but I didn’t think that man could step into the workplace and be respected and taken seriously the way he wanted to present himself. There was a fear during the early days of leading IDEAS xLab that being too gay might limit our funding options, who would partner and work with us and how our contributions would be valued.

There were internal and external messages of tone it down; that’s not professional. So, I’d wear a blazer and wingtips instead of platform shoes and a tunic. Instead of eyeshadow and earrings, small flourishes like a custom bowtie.

When I felt the need to cover early on in my professional career, alcohol was the primary way I coped – drinking before social functions as a primer and having multiple glasses of wine at night before heading to bed. Over the years, I have also struggled with eating disorders, another way I cope when my environment or parts of my life feel out of control.

In the beginning - I didn’t necessarily notice the toll it took to cover – downplay, hide or filter parts of myself at work, with different social groups, at school, or with family. But over time, the evidence became visible, and so did my coping strategies.

The authors of  The Costs of Code-Switching from Harvard Business Review outline that “seeking to avoid stereotypes [through code-switching] is hard work, and can deplete cognitive resources and hinder performance. Feigning commonality with coworkers also reduces authentic self-expression and contributes to burnout.”

Code-switching, which falls within the broader covering umbrella, “involves adjusting one’s style of speech, appearance, behavior, and expression in ways that will optimize the comfort of others in exchange for fair treatment, quality service, and employment opportunities.

Let’s read that again. It’s done to “optimize the comfort of others in exchange for fair treatment, quality service, and employment opportunities.”

There was a point when I could take a step back and recognize what was happening. That I was hiding or filtering parts of myself to make other people comfortable without realizing that it was depleting me and decreasing my motivation and participation, all while triggering coping behaviors that held the potential to derail everything I was working toward.

In their article Coping with Fatigue, Fear and Panic During a Crisis, Tony Schwartz and Emily Pines write, “Fatigue, fear, and panic undermine our ability to think clearly and creatively, manage our relationships effectively, focus attention on the right priorities, and make smart, informed choices… We can’t change what we don’t notice, so the first step is becoming more aware of what we’re feeling at any given moment.”

Becoming aware of the impact that covering (language I didn’t have at the time) had on me helped me to face reality. Was the trade-off worth it? No, it wasn’t. Was the possibility that my fears would become realized worth uncovering the queer parts of myself? Yes. There would be other people to partner with and other funders to support our work. I knew that to create the type of impact I wanted in the world; I had to change how I showed up for myself, my (now) husband, friends, and colleagues.

It’s a privilege to be able to make that choice. I lead the nonprofit I co-founded and work with a team who believes we should value each person’s lived experience and identity, as I do.

The process to uncover started 5-6 years ago and continues as I unlearn outdated mental models and cultural norms about what it means to be a professional, a man, and a leader.

So what happened with my drinking? In 2018, I had a meeting of the minds of sorts. I made two lists simultaneously. One with all the things I value and want to achieve, and the other with the things that could undermine or detract from my wellbeing and impact. Alcohol was at the top of the 2nd list. It took me months to work through giving it up - the signs were there that my alcohol use disorder could derail everything.

I started by taking a month off from drinking. I thought I’ll just take a break, then put a limit in place for myself. I’ll only have 1-2 drinks at events, and that’s it. Well, that didn’t go so well. My brain doesn’t understand why you’d drink and stop – it also doesn’t have the drunk part of the drinking spectrum – I go from tipsy to black, a byproduct of drinking too much at a young age (that’s self-diagnosed, by the way). I also found that I started to hate the feeling of what alcohol did to me – I couldn’t remember conversations over dinner or people’s names. The feeling of being hungover when I wanted to run impacted those experiences too.

So, I finally quit drinking in 2018. The Kentucky Derby was my last day enjoying a Mint Julep. It was a great day and my last time consuming alcohol. The following year as part of the Derby Diversity & Business Summit, we added mocktails (alcohol-free cocktails) to the menu at social events. Churchill Downs had a mocktail popup at the Derby (photo on right), so I could still participate in the festivities without having to drink. That shift helped me feel included and valued in spaces focused on alcohol as a social lubricant.

My experience is just one example of how covering and coping can be intertwined and mutually reinforcing. As I continue to uncover, relearn, and grow, I see my coping strategies and their impact. This allows me to change or adapt how I show up, what boundaries I have in place, and the environment in which I work and live.

• Can you think of times when covering or code-switching made you feel exhausted, stressed, or devalued?

• What coping behaviors do you use to deal with covering? What impact do these strategies have on you?

If you’re willing to share your story about covering or coping, send me a message, add it in the comments, or email connect@joshmiller.ventures.

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About: Josh Miller is a queer changemaker, public speaker, photographer, and outdoor explorer. He is the owner of Josh Miller Ventures and the co-founder + CEO of IDEAS xLab—an organization that uses the art of storytelling and community collaboration to impact public health. Miller’s work has been featured by The New York Times, the Aspen Institute, and the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation. He is a Soros Equality Fellow, received the 2022 Nonprofit Visionary Leader Award from Louisville Business First, and was selected for Business Equality Magazine’s Forty LGBTQ+ Leaders under 40 and Louisville Business First's Forty under 40. Miller is a two-time TEDx speaker and has been described as a "force in our community.” He holds an MBA from Indiana University and an undergraduate degree from Bellarmine University. Previously, he served as an advisor to the Derby Diversity & Business Summit and co-chair for the Louisville Health advisory board’s communications committee. 

Serenity Wright on covering at school, leveraging your cultural experience, and uncovering for herself

When people think about covering, they don’t associate it with something that takes place across all groups in some form. Someone may cover having grown up in poverty, a deaf person may not mention their disability, and a trans person may avoid using the bathroom in certain spaces.

I recently had the chance to talk to Serenity Wright, the Associate Director of Social Innovation at the University of Kentucky, about where she saw covering present in her life, some of the roots it stemmed from, and how she has been processing it and uncovering parts of herself at work and home.

We started with covering – downplaying, hiding, or filtering parts of ourselves at work, with different social groups, at school, or with family.

Serenity shared that there was a “critical moment in time for me that truly shaped a lot of how I choose to cover and why. I'm bi-racial, and my dad is Chinese-Indonesian. I was raised in Indonesia until I was about 16. The high school I went to when we came back here (to the United States) seemed very excited about having me as a student, very intrigued that I was an international and diverse student. I had a particular experience with an English teacher; she said, ‘You'll bring so much to the class.’ I really felt like her classroom would be a safe space for me. But it could not have been more of an opposite experience. There was so much I didn’t understand. She would say, ‘You don't know because -- You're not from here (or) English is your second language. You'll need to skip recess to learn what’s missing. It was all grounded in lived experience. For years I didn't talk about it.”

She described how those early experiences shaped how and what she shared of herself at school and in her years as a public school teacher because of limitations with language, early education, and understanding things like using a computer and navigating a syllabus.

Serenity said, “I stood naked in that classroom and then promptly put on a winter parka [to cover]. It took me a really long time to take it off, and to own who I was and how it [cultural experiences] impacted what I learned and what I understood.”

I shared that I was homeschooled until 10th grade, and I’d started to go to school for some of the same reasons Serenity returned to the United States to finish high school. I didn’t feel like I was being prepared for what was expected of me in college – the essays, tests, collaborative projects, the cultural expectations. And while different, we both had domains of knowledge missing as we entered high school. While my math was on track and my reading ability was at the college level, my geography and historical knowledge were seriously lacking. Also lacking was a deep understanding of grammar, something Serenity related to. We structured our sentences based on what we’d read and heard and what sounded right.

“I teach my children Mandarin,” she said. “I grew up speaking Mandarin and Bahasa, but never got formal language training in any language I speak, including English. It wasn’t until a couple months ago when my son got so frustrated about the difference in syntax, that I realized I couldn’t explain it. Written language has always been a concern – it’s something I’m never confident in.”

So how did those experiences translate to the workplace?

“I never discussed it [growing up in Indonesia and the cultural differences] in my first professional space where I was a public-school teacher for years,” Serenity said. “The principal knew about my upbringing, he was my safe space because he knew my family.”

However, things evolved as she entered higher education and saw how her early frustrations and experiences could shape how she served students. “I leveraged that experience to inform how I supported international students or students from smaller counties. The coping mechanism and struggles were very similar just from different lenses.”

Through her experiences during COVID-19, the rise in hate crimes again the Asian community, and through self-reflection, Serenity found that “it took seeing, feeling, and experiencing leadership that truly supported me in all facets without it being done in an exposing or token kind of way for me to own the experience myself,” she said. “Through that process, I've been able to uncover for me as opposed to uncovering for someone else. 

Creating different ways of working with colleagues can also mean speaking up for yourself and explaining how you work or process information that may not be visible. “I once had a boss who I felt kept interrupting me when I paused,” she said. “I finally told him, ‘I am filtering through three languages in my head so you can be patient as I get my words right because you'll pick them apart if I don't.’ I'm overly conscious of what I'm communicating and how you will receive it and your perception of and experience with me. It comes out more at work but comes out across all areas of life.”

Serenity is one of those people whose smile makes you immediately feel comfortable. After two hours of conversation, we ended our time together with a question from her about some of the language I used in my Uncovering Your Value keynote. She said, “One of the pieces I found most interesting was that people should have choice/agency in how they show up.

So, is it about showing up as much as possible or about their personal choice? How does the possible impact choice?”

When I talk about covering in the workplace, the culture should support people feeling safe and secure enough to bring as much of themselves into the workplace as possible. For me, that’s connected to how I dress, carry and present myself. For others, it might be sharing that they hung out with their grandkids over the weekend or, like Serenity, are translating across multiple languages at any given time.  From the individual side, it’s about choice and agency. Do I want to share this part of myself with my colleagues or a client? If the trust and sense of belonging are there, I believe it’s a choice within what is possible. I’m not advocating that a company require people to reveal all their deepest secrets; what I think is important is that individuals can bring and share the parts of themselves that positively impact their work, their relationships with colleagues, and their overall health and wellbeing.

If what Serenity and I discussed resonates with you, I’d love to hear your thoughts, experiences, or additional questions! Please send me a DM or email connect@joshmiller.ventures to delve deeper into this topic with me.

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About: Josh Miller is a queer changemaker, public speaker, photographer, and outdoor explorer. He is the owner of Josh Miller Ventures and the co-founder + CEO of IDEAS xLab—an organization that uses the art of storytelling and community collaboration to impact public health. Miller’s work has been featured by The New York Times, the Aspen Institute, and the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation. He is a Soros Equality Fellow, received the 2022 Nonprofit Visionary Leader Award from Louisville Business First, and was selected for Business Equality Magazine’s Forty LGBTQ+ Leaders under 40 and Louisville Business First's Forty under 40. Miller is a two-time TEDx speaker and has been described as a "force in our community.” He holds an MBA from Indiana University and an undergraduate degree from Bellarmine University. Previously, he served as an advisor to the Derby Diversity & Business Summit and co-chair for the Louisville Health advisory board’s communications committee. 

A future built on dynamic values and evolving realities

Something refreshing comes when we are reminded that for countless years, humans have been grappling with the big, timeless question, “What is a good society? And can it be created in a world of conflicting values?”

In 2018, my husband Theo and I participated in the Aspen Institute Executive Leadership Seminars program, bringing together 20 leaders from multiple countries for a week to engage and learn.

I often think back to that experience and how it further helped me understand the role covering had played (and does play) in my life and the lives of those around me, how it influenced and impacted my leadership abilities, and how my presence and stories can impact people and help them see the world differently.

Covering - downplaying, hiding, or filtering parts of yourself at work, with different social groups, at school, or with family.

During the seminar, I was reminded how much our upbringing and the cultural norms we’re raised with and live and work within shape our values and decisions.  These also shape how we navigate challenging conversations and weigh trade-offs. In seeking to understand why and how someone is deciding, we can learn a lot about how they view the world and the underlying values that inform how they operate.

The seminar conversations brought this to light - showing the stark contrast of how people sitting across from each other would respond in different situations. In one instance, we talked about how people might use their time if we moved to a 20-hour workweek. Some of us thought about the positive ways we would collectively use that time - more outdoor exploration, time with family, art creation, learning new languages, and starting new business ventures. Others thought about the negative - there would be an increase in crime, murder, and drug use, and people would be less active and complacent.

What would your answer to the question have been?

Our worldviews and cultural experiences shaped our responses to that question. It was a much-needed reminder that these types of beliefs then inform the policies that govern our cities, access to resources, and management of time, and how the culture and climate of a workplace are created and maintained.

After the Seminar, I wrote a reflection while running one morning. As we continue to delve into the topics of covering, coping, burnout, and reimagining the future of work - taking into account how people make decisions and the role that our values play in how we engage with people and approach these topics - I thought it would be worth re-sharing. You can read my full recap of the Aspen Institute Executive Seminar here.

My reflections written while running…

I arrived clad in chainmail

And left in a cluster of pearls [of nature and wisdom]

Challenged to step beyond preconceived notions

That a “good society” was easy to define, and create

Your wisdom that travels across time zones and continents required I ask new questions

With generational and cultural experiences all informing the way we saw our connected future

I sought out this seminar fervently

I longed to be pulled out of my head

To be required to respond quickly

And at the same time, was told my silent presence offered a safe haven

I realize now how much the busy had gotten in the way of the work, of reflection

The blur of time limiting my ability to show up as the best person I could

For you, for us, for a future built on dynamic values and evolving realities

Of leadership and management my thinking expanded

Reflecting on what I had let slip because my expectations were built on an unstable foundation

I saw more clearly where generalizations were getting in our way

Causing us to assume of others what we repeatedly called out as wrong

I recounted the leadership trials that took place

Watching as you and I each navigated scenarios while trying to find balance in a week full of ideas and debates

I wouldn’t trade this experience for anything

Even if Billy Budd continued to be a required reading

For even in that text I’d been reminded how much we insert context as a frame for laws and what is and is not acceptable

Running in the morning, I explored longer shutter speeds and experimenting with light

The creation and taste of s’mores reminded me of simpler joys, ones not predicated on the limiting factors of calories and a lack of time to build a fire outdoors

The feeling of being a child once again… do you remember?

I thought of your words, from Mexico, Spain, Fiji, the U.K…

And pondered how I could translate the breadth of these thoughts into practice

Before they dissipate as I re-enter a chaotic season of change

Our analects were a challenge, a fervent reminder

For it takes small strides to make systemic change

And passing the torch as if it’s not my problem just won’t due

In departing you called me “son” during a warm embrace

I cried, not knowing how that single word would pierce the barriers contrived for self-protection

You said, “you’re amazing “

And I wondered what things were invisible to me that you saw

We left, some by train, by car, by plane

Traveling hours and days to enact our new-found reality

As a politician or a leader-manager, as a bridge builder between networks

Driving down the winding roads away from Wye River,

I thought of liberty, equality, efficiency and community… of the good society

And my role in striving toward balance

Toward hope, as Maya Angelou said

Rebuilding through resilience time and time again

A future worthy of our efforts, and our lives.

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About: Josh Miller is a queer changemaker, public speaker, photographer, and outdoor explorer. He is the owner of Josh Miller Ventures and the co-founder + CEO of IDEAS xLab—an organization that uses the art of storytelling and community collaboration to impact public health. Miller’s work has been featured by The New York Times, the Aspen Institute, and the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation. He is a Soros Equality Fellow, received the 2022 Nonprofit Visionary Leader Award from Louisville Business First, and was selected for Business Equality Magazine’s Forty LGBTQ+ Leaders under 40 and Louisville Business First's Forty under 40. Miller is a two-time TEDx speaker and has been described as a "force in our community.” He holds an MBA from Indiana University and an undergraduate degree from Bellarmine University. Previously, he served as an advisor to the Derby Diversity & Business Summit and co-chair for the Louisville Health advisory board’s communications committee. 

Are you covering at work?

Over a decade ago, as a young queer professional, I covered. 

I define covering as “downplaying, hiding or filtering parts of ourselves at work, with different social groups, at school or with family.”

I didn’t have the words for it back then, but that’s what it was. Facets of it are also called code-switching. To cover, my younger professional self wore button ups and wingtips rather than a dress and heels, less makeup, and kept my hair short. It was done out of self-protection and because of the explicit and implicit codes of conduct and cultural norms that were in place about what it meant to be a “professional” and a “man.”

It wasn’t until a few years ago that I came to terms with the impact covering had on me, including my health, relationships, and ability to lead, be creative and innovate. It also triggered coping mechanisms like drinking copious amounts of alcohol and brought me close to the edge of burnout. That’s when my journey to uncover and change how I showed up began as a queer nonprofit leader and entrepreneur.

In 2019 I read Deloitte’s Uncovering Talent Report, where more than 3,000 corporate professionals were surveyed. What I appreciated learning was that covering was taking place across groups for a variety of reasons. Deloitte’s report shows that 45% of straight white men, 67% of women of color, and 83% of queer respondents all said they covered in some form.

Since reading that report and reflecting on my experience, I’ve been curious about how covering has presented in other people’s lives. During a series of interviews I did as part of IDEAS xLab’s Uncovering Video Podcast, I asked professionals if they covered and what that looked like for them.

“I've always regarded it as more of a muting of pieces of me. I am very clear about the parts of me that may not be desirable in prevailingly white-dominated workplaces,” said Nikki Lanier, founder of Harper Slade. “Parts of my culture my banter, my cadence - the rhythm with which I speak and walk and talk. I’m very worried about colloquialisms that I might use at work to the extent to which that might render me subject to more stereotypes.”

Through other interviews and leading IDEA (Inclusion, Diversity, Equity & Accessibility) consulting and public speaking with my team member Hannah Drake with corporate teams and nonprofit boards, we’ve heard about covering related to age, race, gender, disability, and more. Like not mentioning that you spent the weekend with your grandkids to your colleagues or that you use hearing aids because of a disability. As trust was built and people worked through the activity and talked with their colleagues and peers about how covering was present in their lives, the environment changed, and so did the strength of their relationships and people's sense of belonging.

It makes me wonder –

Do you cover?

Did the past few years change how you show up and encourage you to uncover in specific ways?

If you’re willing to share your story, send me a message, add it in the comments, or email connect@joshmiller.ventures.

In the coming weeks, I’ll continue to delve into the intersection of covering, coping, burnout, and where we are today after multiple years of disruption from COVID-19 and the ever-evolving socio-political environment. The opportunity we have at this moment in time and the factors that hold the potential to shape how we move forward.

I also invite you to complete the Workforce Census on Creativity & Belonging, conducted by CU Denver's Imaginator Academy - where they are building an imagination engine to align culture change with innovation to support belonging at work, economic growth, and well-being.

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About: Josh Miller is a queer changemaker, public speaker, photographer, and outdoor explorer. He is the owner of Josh Miller Ventures and the co-founder + CEO of IDEAS xLab—an organization that uses the art of storytelling and community collaboration to impact public health. Miller’s work has been featured by The New York Times, the Aspen Institute, and the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation. He is a Soros Equality Fellow, received the 2022 Nonprofit Visionary Leader Award from Louisville Business First, and was selected for Business Equality Magazine’s Forty LGBTQ+ Leaders under 40 and Louisville Business First's Forty under 40. Miller is a two-time TEDx speaker and has been described as a "force in our community.” He holds an MBA from Indiana University and an undergraduate degree from Bellarmine University. Previously, he served as an advisor to the Derby Diversity & Business Summit and co-chair for the Louisville Health advisory board’s communications committee. 

The Luxury and Challenge of Public Spaces - Josh Miller

Since childhood, I’ve loved being outside. I enjoyed climbing bluffs, playing basketball, frisbee in the park and rollerblading on the walking bridge in Chattanooga, TN. It wasn’t until the past eight to 10 years that running became my obsession. It wasn’t just the act of running, it was the exploration of new places, the view through a camera lens and a fence of a city slowly starting to wake up. I noticed the occasional nod and smile as I passed someone while the sun rose, honoring the briefly shared space we inhabited.

I run early. A 5 a.m. cup of coffee and out the door is how I like to start my day. I feel safer when the world is half asleep. It’s when my mind is clearest. I can strategize and connect disparate ideas. I can write — I outlined this piece while running. This, I have come to realize, is even more of a luxury than I knew. I’ve never felt like my life was at risk. Yes, vehicles turn without looking and I’ve had to hit a car-hood or two. As I got leaner and grew out my hair, I started getting more and more catcalls, and in the summer, weird looks because some people have a hard time understanding “what” I am. A man, a woman, trans? For the record, I’m a gay man who is slightly curvy and wears short shorts. Yet, none of this compares to other experiences, like shifts due to COVID-19, those faced by women and communities of color when we talk about being in public spaces.

In March as COVID-19 started to impact our lives in more drastic ways, I started putting in a lot more running miles, afraid that one day Governor Andy Beshear would say, “You can’t be doing that” when it came to being outside. And while that didn’t happen, over the weeks, attitudes have changed and the number of people outside has drastically jumped.

With warmer weather brought more people out on the Big Four Bridge in the afternoons and on the trails of Jefferson Memorial Forest. It brought confusion surrounding how to navigate physical distancing while passing each other. How to share space with bikes, strollers, wheelchairs, dogs and kids.

Biking on the Big Four Bridge one afternoon, I encountered people walking together, but on separate sides of the bridge for physical distancing, who got visibly angry when I rang my bell and announced that I needed to pass. I’ve had to dodge children and families of five to six people taking up 2/3rds of a path. And, the smaller motions, such as a smile, a nod or a wave, have for many been replaced with glares, a quickened pace or refusal to make eye contact.

As I thought about the many benefits of being outside, I harkened back to the words of Florence Williams who I met in Aspen, Colorado in 2017 at the Aspen Ideas Health Festival.

“We need quick incursions to natural areas that engage our senses. Everyone needs access to clean, quiet and safe natural refuges in a city,” she writes in her book The Nature Fix. “Short exposures to nature can make us less aggressive, more creative, more civic minded and healthier overall.” Williams researched the effect of time spent in nature all across the world.

Being outdoors — whether it’s in a forest, a park or just taking a stroll downtown — can provide benefits.

Community members catching up while physically-distancing at Louisville’s waterfront park.

The question becomes, how do we evolve mental models and shift attitudes so that everyone feels safe and welcome to go out and engage with each other outside? This is a question of safety, public health and overall community wellbeing. If a gym is closed, and you don’t feel safe going to a park or walking down the sidewalk, how will you practice healthy physical activity that we know can impact not only our bodies, but our emotional, social and mental health?

“When I think about going in public spaces, I enter with a bit of caution,” said Louisville Ballet dancer Brandon Ragland. “Right now, especially, I feel like tensions are so high and people (myself included) are tired of being stuck at home, so I try to get fresh air whenever possible. With that being said, as a Black man, it is hard to feel like I have the freedom to enter public spaces without fear of other people perceiving me as a threat. For the most part, I tend to stay in my neighborhood, which has a variety of people of different racial backgrounds. Thankfully, I have not felt unsafe walking or running outside during the day. I generally try to keep all my outside activities to during the day.”

Yet, even in broad daylight — as we saw recently with the shooting of Black runner Ahmaud Arbery in Georgia, who was chased down by two White men — does not guarantee safety. When I heard about Arbery’s murder, something hurt deep in my stomach for him, for his family. I thought about what it would do to me as a person to know that I was held prisoner in my home because of my skin color, when all I wanted to do was go outside. I cannot comprehend what it is like. I’m White, my skin is so fair I almost glow. I do know that my weight and physical strength, my mental and emotional health and the unhealthy coping mechanisms I seek to avoid, would all be impacted and exacerbated.

Add the stress and uncertainty of COVID-19 on top of the existing racism and other phobias in our country — homophobia, sexism, etc. — and it’s the perfect storm. “As for what I’ve noticed when I’m out and about, people have gone far beyond ‘cautious’ and ‘basic safety.’ They have gone straight up crazy!” said runner Melissa Joyce, who I met as a 2016 Kentucky Derby Festival Marathon Ambassador. “There’s rudeness, yelling and even violence when people think you’re ‘invading’ their space. The public at large has started operating from a stance of fear, and logic and common sense has died. Maybe that’s not everywhere, but it’s what I notice in my circle of life.”

I’ve seen what Joyce describes, and also people demonstrating the positive ways we can engage in public spaces. It gives me hope knowing that together we can change this. It’s our role as community members who value each other’s health and wellbeing to shape the public spaces we use every day.

“I try to make eye contact and nod my head,” said Yvonne Austin about being out in public. “When maneuvering outside, I always take the lead to maintain distance.”

Artist and Quappi Project owner John Brooks, who often takes his poodle Ludwig out for walks, said, “There has been a noticeable difference in the number of people in the park [Cherokee] since they closed the loop to automobile traffic. I have mixed feelings about this because of accessibility to public spaces, but at the same time, it’s a much more pleasant place to be. It even feels bucolic at times and, of course, there is much more space to practice social distancing. The traffic flow of pedestrians and bicycles typically is to the right, and while it is somewhat random because people go in both directions, everyone seems to find the rhythm. No one is bumping into each other. Most everyone seems to be respecting the practice of social distancing.”

Athlete Melissa Christensen recommended, “Walk single file when you are with your household and encounter someone else on a path or trail to increase room. Definitely call out passes [when you need to go around someone] and do it with plenty of notice to allow the person to react. There are a lot of people who aren’t used to using trails and walkways using them right now that might not be familiar with trail etiquette. Definitely wave or nod since it’s hard to see smiles if you have on a mask.”

All good recommendations and things to consider. If we take the Big Four Bridge as an example, could we collectively consider the flow of traffic like a multi-lane road, staying on the right as we head across and leaving the middle for passing? Can we infuse these spaces with grace if someone’s bell surprises us, or we must slow down or move to make way for a child? And, can we go out of our way to ensure that spaces are welcoming for everyone? I don’t have all of the answers, but collectively, we can change that.

In Paris, they converted miles of roadway into multi-modal paths because of the number of people outside and an increase in biking as a primary mode of transportation. As we look ahead, I believe COVID-19 is going to fundamentally change what it means to share space in the long-term – on sidewalks, in parks, on roads. The question is, will you be part of that solution? Will you be an ally and trained accomplice to ensure that our public spaces support a different approach to health and wellbeing so that we can, in the words of Governor Beshear, “Get through this together”? I certainly hope so. V

Story and Photos by Josh Miller

Published May 28, 2020 https://voice-tribune.com/_/life-style-2/the-luxury-and-challenge-of-public-spaces/

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About: Josh Miller is a queer changemaker, public speaker, photographer, and outdoor explorer. He is the owner of Josh Miller Ventures and the co-founder + CEO of IDEAS xLab—an organization that uses the art of storytelling and community collaboration to impact public health. Miller’s work has been featured by The New York Times, the Aspen Institute, and the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation. He is a Soros Equality Fellow, received the 2022 Nonprofit Visionary Leader Award from Louisville Business First, and was selected for Business Equality Magazine’s Forty LGBTQ+ Leaders under 40 and Louisville Business First's Forty under 40. Miller is a two-time TEDx speaker and has been described as a "force in our community.” He holds an MBA from Indiana University and an undergraduate degree from Bellarmine University. Previously, he served as an advisor to the Derby Diversity & Business Summit and co-chair for the Louisville Health advisory board’s communications committee. 

A Different Relationship to Derby

It was during my senior year of high-school in Floyds Knobs, Indiana when I started wearing makeup. I’d just relocated to live with my aunt and cousins who welcomed me in after a year-long dispute launched when I was outed as gay to my parents. My relationship with alcohol started a few years earlier – chugging Bacardi 151 beside a campfire after sneaking out to the fort my friends and I built in the woods. One - a form of self-expression, the other - a coping mechanism.

It’s interesting how some things we believe empower us, actually take away our power. In an interview with Queer Kentucky in 2019, I said, “the story I told myself was that I needed it [alcohol] to be social, needed it to show-up in the way I wanted, needed it to belong. In fact, it undermined all of those things.”

Over the past few years, my relationship to the “Run for the Roses” on the first Saturday in May has changed. I grew up watching it on TV, and now the Kentucky Derby is the anniversary of my sobriety from drinking alcohol. It’s been four years since I had my last Mint Julep at the track, and while I miss a dirty martini or cabernet every once in a while, I don’t miss what it did to my body and my mind.

Why did I stop drinking? Beyond my brain’s jump from tipsy to blackout, it was a “meeting of the minds” while standing on the bridge over the creek at Theo’s parents house in Eastern Kentucky. My subconscious made a list of the things I’m proud of and want to excel at and honor (like relationships), and a list of the things in my life that could undermine what I’m working toward. My unhealthy relationship with alcohol was at the top of the list.

Derby day 2018 (left photo above) was my last day of drinking. It was a great day! I enjoyed a Mint Julep, spent time with Derby Diversity & Business Summit (now Derby Diversity Week) attendees, and enjoyed fashion at the track - that was it. No drama, no blackout. I recognize how fortunate I am that it was not because of a DUI (or worse) that I stopped, I’m grateful that it didn’t take something like that to help me reevaluate how to move forward in my relationship with drinking.

Flash forward to this year, and I’ve broken from another addiction – caffeine. My first sips as a kid wanting to participate in my grandpa’s morning ritual. And in the fall and winter this past year, finding myself drinking four cups a day, crashing in the afternoon, and rocking a consistent eye twitch.

Needless to say – I’ve been thinking a lot about the rituals and practices that are part of our lives. The ones that make us better people – healthier, happier, more productive, more at peace, more creative. For me, combining photography, outdoor adventures and fashion to create Wearable Photos™. And the ones that don’t, but we tell ourselves are necessary, and that we can’t live without them.

As Finn Janning wrote in The Happiness of Burnout, “Breaking a habit stresses that learning relates to the future. Basically, one breaks a habit not only because it has caused conflicts; for instance, the habit of doing everything according to achieving a specific goal. Rather one breaks with habits where one is capable of producing new meaning, new values that free one from the imprisonment of blindly following the herd.”

Have a great week - and thanks to everyone who is actively seeking to make the spaces they are creating welcoming and inclusive to people who don't drink (alcohol, caffeine, etc.).

With gratitude -
Josh

Photos above: Left - Kentucky Derby 2018 drinking a Mint Julep; Right - Kentucky Derby 2019 drinking an alcohol-free cocktail (mocktail) with The Mocktail Project. Both outfits by Gunnar Deatherage.

Sign-up for my newsletter here featuring writings on leadership and life, photo essays, Wearable Photos™ updates and more.

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About: Josh Miller is a queer changemaker, public speaker, photographer, and outdoor explorer. He is the owner of Josh Miller Ventures and the co-founder + CEO of IDEAS xLab—an organization that uses the art of storytelling and community collaboration to impact public health. Miller’s work has been featured by The New York Times, the Aspen Institute, and the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation. He is a Soros Equality Fellow, received the 2022 Nonprofit Visionary Leader Award from Louisville Business First, and was selected for Business Equality Magazine’s Forty LGBTQ+ Leaders under 40 and Louisville Business First's Forty under 40. Miller is a two-time TEDx speaker and has been described as a "force in our community.” He holds an MBA from Indiana University and an undergraduate degree from Bellarmine University. Previously, he served as an advisor to the Derby Diversity & Business Summit and co-chair for the Louisville Health advisory board’s communications committee. 

Creativity and Innovation: Reflecting on the Cross-Atlantic Creativity Congress

Until recently, creativity was one of those words that was hard for me to define, and easy to use. We often hear phrases like "That's so creative" and sometimes I find myself asking, "Is it though?"

Just like understanding hope in terms of hope theory - with hope being comprised of goals, pathways, and agency, understanding some of the research behind creativity provided me with new language and insights.

As Margaret Boden wrote, “A creative idea is one which is novel, surprising, and valuable (interesting, useful, beautiful…).”

It was the topic of creativity that brought together creativity researchers, experience designers, artists and business leaders from the U.S. and the EU to advance creativity across the world this past week in Salzburg, Austria for the first Cross-Atlantic Creativity Congress (CACC).

"Behind all innovations are a group of people who can imagine a different or better future for all of us," said CACC co-curator and Sonophilia Foundation founder Seda Röder, who reminded us that creativity is 5th in the World Economic Forum's Top 10 Job Skills of Tomorrow list.

Before CACC, I hadn’t realized how many myths there are about creativity. “Children are more creative than adults” – false. “Creativity is essentially the same as art” – false. “Creative accomplishments are usually the result of a sudden inspiration” – false. What research has shown, according to Benedek et al. is that “achieving a creative breakthrough in a domain (i.e. publishing a successful novel) typically requires at least 10 years of deliberate work,” and “creativity is an important part of mathematical thinking.”

From business leadership to creating art and developing research studies to map how our brain accesses our memories – creativity in its many forms are present across industries. And, that was what my presentation during CACC focused on, the “Creativity of Artists” and how our work at IDEAS xLab has supported corporate innovation, transdisciplinary work with public health, and community collaborations.

Memories, relationships, cultural context, the zeitgeist, our willingness to participate in new experiences – all things that can impact how creativity presents itself in our lives. These insights made me think about how my mind uses the time when I am merging cycling and running with photography to be creative - to connect disparate ideas, experiences and bodies of knowledge in new and useful ways.

I departed Salzburg and Berlin with a new understanding of creativity – mine and others, both personal and professional.

It makes me wonder - What does creativity look like to you? How do you see it in your life?

With gratitude -
Josh
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Above: Photo from the Hotel Schloss Leopoldskron terrace after breakfast before CACC 2022.

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Additional Quotes from CACC that resonated with me.

"Creativity is the infrastructure of the future." - Faye Hobson, Associate Director of Salzburg Global Seminar

“Creativity is big international business… simulations will be the conveyor belt of the circular economy.” - Bernd Fesel, Director of the European Creative Business Network

“Creativity has been the driving force behind every human innovation and problem we have solved, and isn’t replicable by AI.” - Hannah Merseal, Penn State

Read CACC co-curator Theo Edmonds’ reflection here: imagination bones

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Photos from the first Cross-Atlantic Creativity Congress

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Photos from Salzburg, Austria

Photos from Berlin, Germany

A Reorientation to Time

I don’t know about you, but the pandemic changed how I relate to time. Not just the collapse of time that’s made many of us ask, “Did that happen last week or two years ago?” But, at a more foundational level of how I structure my days, how my days are connected across weeks and months, and how I find harmony as things evolve.

Before COVID, the idea of taking two hours in an afternoon to bike or rollerblade was unthinkable. The very thought that we might need to push a huge deadline or clear multiple days of meetings would have sent my blood pressure through the roof. But, after two years, that’s changed.

I’ve done away with the idea of a 40-hour Monday-Friday work week. I’ve moved beyond the notion that there isn’t time to create harmony between work, personal life, and the things that bring us joy and refuel us to make an impact. Each morning, I look at the entire week, I look at seven days. I consider workload and deadlines, the weather, travel, personal commitments, how I feel, it all informs how things get prioritized that day. It isn’t about balance, it’s about harmony. One day may be primarily at a computer for work starting before the sun rises. Another may find me biking for three hours on a weekday while my mind examines our work from 30,000 feet, putting together the disparate pieces for how to move a project forward – unleashed by being outside, the awe of the mountains, and synergy between mind and body.

I am grateful that I have the autonomy to approach time in this way, knowing that isn't the case for everyone. Hannah Drake and I lead IDEAS xLab, collectively embracing a flexible schedule - something we've talked about explicitly. If you are in a position to give people autonomy for how they use their time, I encourage you to do so. The world isn't going back to what it was, and with the erasure of the dividing line between work and out-of-work time, finding harmony has become even harder when old work-week rules and expectations apply.

In Tim Ferris’ recent podcast, Boyd Varty quotes the Shangaan men he works with - a quote that has stuck with me. “I don’t know where we are going, but I know exactly how to get there.” Varty was talking about tracking animals in the wilds of South Africa. Finding the next bent blade of grass, paw print, clue that led you to the next, and the next. An inner knowing and belief in the process, even if the path wasn’t laid out like a paved road ahead of you.

A different relationship to time has allowed me to embrace that feeling more. An openness to what will unfold, to how creative endeavors will be built piece by piece as new ways of working and fresh ideas take it to the next level. That is how it's been with my Wearable Photos, experimentation and trying something a little different each time to see how the outcomes change. I don't know where it's all going or how long it will take, but I do know how to get there - one step at a time.

With gratitude -
Josh Miller

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Josh Miller Ventures Photo Essay: February - March 2022

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Denver Fashion Week Fall 2021

For Denver Fashion Week Fall 2021, I walked in two runway shows at the McNichols Civic Center.

November 20, 2021 I walked for KetiVani - who paired one of my “Cherry Creek” silk Wearable Photos prints with a Louis Vuitton bag for my first look that included a leather skirt, silk top and leather and Italian wool jacket, and incorporated a “Pink Moon” silk Wearable Photos print into my second look with a black leather and cashmere coat and hat and leather skirt.

Photo above of Look 2 by Roxanna Carrasco for 303 Magazine.

Watch my IG Reel with show finally and bts photos here.

Center photo and KetiVani gallery below by Roxanna Carrasco for 303 Magazine. Left and Right: “Cherry Creek” silk Wearable Photos print with Louis Vuitton bag for Look 1.

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November 21, 2021 I walked for Denver Rummage Shop as part of the Garage Sale Segment, wearing all silk and gold stockings with gold accessories and a lightning bolt earring.

Photo 1 is bts with fellow model Susan Zager. Photos 2-4 below by Adrienne Thomas for 303 Magazine.

Watch my IG Reel with show footage and bts photos here.

Below - Josh Miller in KetiVani Look 2 with “Pink Moon” silk Wearable Photos, Theo Edmonds in “Curious Gaze” chiffon Wearable Photos, and on right - Josh Miller in custom Gunnar Deatherage bodysuit with “Energy & Light” chiffon Wearable Photos print.

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About: Josh Miller is a queer changemaker, public speaker, photographer, and outdoor explorer. He is the owner of Josh Miller Ventures and the co-founder + CEO of IDEAS xLab—an organization that uses the art of storytelling and community collaboration to impact public health. Miller’s work has been featured by The New York Times, the Aspen Institute, and the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation. He is a Soros Equality Fellow, received the 2022 Nonprofit Visionary Leader Award from Louisville Business First, and was selected for Business Equality Magazine’s Forty LGBTQ+ Leaders under 40 and Louisville Business First's Forty under 40. Miller is a two-time TEDx speaker and has been described as a "force in our community.” He holds an MBA from Indiana University and an undergraduate degree from Bellarmine University. Previously, he served as an advisor to the Derby Diversity & Business Summit and co-chair for the Louisville Health advisory board’s communications committee. 

Colorado and Kentucky photographs featured in F/W 2021 Wearable Photos Collection

Denver, CO – From Denver, CO to Louisville, KY, Josh Miller Ventures’ Fall/Winter 2021 Wearable Photos Collection includes 14 photographs taken while running, hiking, and cycling. Created by combining photography, fashion design and outdoor explorations, the Wearable Photos are available in both silk and chiffon square prints, draped cardigans and two dresses.

“My Fall/Winter 2021 Wearable Photos Collection celebrates where I lived for over twelve years - Kentucky, and where I am now - Colorado,” said artist and designer Josh Miller, owner of Josh Miller Ventures. “From long-exposure cityscapes to photos of awe-inspiring places like the Colorado National Monument, I’m excited to see how people integrate Wearable Photos into their lives, creating a new art installation each time they wear them.”

The Wearable Photos square print sizes range from 16x16" - great as a pocket square, cravat, small scarf, and to accessorize your bag - up to 36x36" and 50x50" prints that can be worn as everything from a scarf to a belt, head wrap, sarong, draped cross-body and more.

"I love the movement in these wearable photos - I sense it even in the still images. They provide a statement accessory to simple solids - as I wore them - yet they are versatile enough to pair with a more daring print as others did,” said Nubia Bennett. “Wearing these photos, I felt inspired to BE art."

Josh Miller Ventures seeks to be as eco-friendly as possible, so Wearable Photos are printed on-demand and shipped directly to collectors – please allow for approximately two-weeks for them to arrive at your door.

Wholesale pricing is available to retailers, and corporations, resorts and tourism departments who want to offer Wearable Photos for VIP clients or as an exclusive offering can email connect@joshmiller.ventures to discuss custom options.

Shop the collection and explore the F/W 2021 Wearable Photos Collection Lookbook: https://joshmiller.ventures/

 Photos above by Amanda Tipton.

Josh Miller Ventures is a queer-owned small business creating Wearable Photos, and offering free-lance photography, public speaking, and inclusive storytelling consulting.

Josh Miller, MBA (he/him) is the owner of Josh Miller Ventures, and co-founder + CEO of IDEAS xLab. He is a 2021 National Leadership Academy for the Public’s Health Fellow, a CBCA Leadership Arts Fellow, and a 2x TEDx speaker.

Josh has been described as a "force in our community,” and was selected for Louisville Business First's Forty under 40 (2018), Business Equality Magazine’s Forty LGBTQ+ Leaders under 40 (2020), and is a CEO Action for Diversity & Inclusion signatory. Josh is a runner and cyclist having participated in the 2018 Gay Games Marathon in Paris, FR and the Kentucky Derby Festival Marathon.

All You Need Is Love - Josh Miller & Theo Edmonds tie the knot in St. James Court

Theo proposed moments before we jumped out of a plane at 10,000 feet to skydive in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico in August 2019. The ring he gave me is inscribed on the inside with a line from a James Baldwin poem we love. It says, “More human dwelling place,” which is a reference to the world and life we are creating together. Heading into 2020, we planned to get married at the Frazier History Museum on New Year’s Eve, December 31, 2020. Little did we know what the year would hold. 

In March, COVID-19 started to disrupt all facets of our lives and we had to consider what that meant for our wedding. It would have brought together almost 150 people inside, something that was no longer possible. So, we made the tough, but necessary, decision to move the bigger wedding celebration to May 2021 and to hold a very small, outdoor ceremony in November 2020. 

Planning one wedding is stressful, but planning two different events and taking pandemic limitations into consideration was another story. Our wedding officiant extraordinaire, Karan Chavis, offered to host the wedding and cupcake reception outdoors in St. James Court with her husband Craig Blakely. We limited attendance, required masks, encouraged people to dress warmly and assigned people to “pods” to maintain physical distancing. We got tested for COVID-19 leading up to the ceremony, and hired someone to help live stream the ceremony since we couldn’t invite everyone we wanted to be with us, also recognizing that people at higher risk or with possible COVID-19 symptoms could not attend. As a last surprise, the baker who was supposed to do the cupcakes had to quarantine due to a possible COVID-19 exposure, so, the day before Thanksgiving and three days before the ceremony, we were searching for a new baker.

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So what does one wear to an outdoor wedding amidst a pandemic? I started working with Gunnar Deatherage on my wedding outfit early in the year, creating a set of multiple interchangeable pieces that can be worn together, layered or as separates and not just for the wedding, but work, dates and more. Theo donned a plaid Brooks Brothers suit with navy flourishes. Our dear friend Hannah Drake wore an off-the-shoulder floor-length black sequin gown with a matching black sequin mask. She gifted both Theo and me with wedding presents right before the ceremony to be worn down the aisle. For me,  to be my “something borrowed, something blue,” she gave a topaz ring which “coincides with the throat chakra,” Hannah said. “As he got married, Josh was speaking his truth.” For Theo, she gave him a crown-shaped pendant from All is Fair in Love and Fashion. “I wanted him to have flair, that’s Theo’s nature. His soul is rhinestones and pearls,” Hannah said. 

Guests were invited to wear black, white and fall tones, and of course, masks. One attendee paired a beaded collar with a paisley print mask, another mixed textures with a leather dress and sequin mask. Other guests wore masks in floral fabrics, with leather trim or stripes, and simple masks paired with a fur or fascinator. 

While walking down the aisle, Theo was joined for the ceremony by his cousin Rhonda, and friends Sabrina, Eleisha and Hannah. My brother Chad and his daughter Ada walked down the aisle, as Ada carefully dropped fall leaves along the walkway. My sisters Patsy, Anna and Meg followed them, as I walked to meet Theo at the altar, stopping to check-in on the live streamer as technology was not our best friend that day and the connection had gone down. 

Karan reminded all of us why, during a pandemic, we had come together: for love. Karan said, “That thing which is most powerful, that thing that is unending, love. We see couples who commit to a life together under the ties that love brings. Today, Josh and Theo join in this journey.” 

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Theo pulled his vows from his jacket pocket, and talked about our marriage as a privilege, saying, “When you are by my side, I don’t consider the enormous limits of life. I know your heart for it sings loudly like my own.” My vows opened with earlier memories from our almost eight-year relationship. I said, “Mustard corduroys, paint-speckled glasses and your smile and energy that embody Dolly Parton’s words, ‘Never leave a rhinestone unturned.’ Those early moments in our relationship are forever seared into my memory. Hanna Benjamin asking, ‘Do you like him?’ and I replied, ‘Yes, I believe I do.’” 

We exchanged rings and Theo’s was black titanium and inscribed with “Our corner of the sky,” a reference to our engagement, the musical he loves and what our union symbolizes. Mine was antler and titanium. After being pronounced husband and husband, we walked back to Karan and Craig’s backyard, where socially distanced “pods” were set up as small tables with their own bottles of champagne to reduce contact and where people could enjoy cupcakes. Lifting glasses of champagne and sparkling cider, we toasted the guests who made our day so magical.

It was more meaningful than we can put into words that we were joined amidst a pandemic by a small group of family and friends who we love, on a day that is such a milestone in our lives. Friends and family who tuned in for the live stream sent emails, photos of them watching from home and texts of joy. While it was not what we had initially planned, it was everything we could have dreamed of. V

By Josh Miller

Photos by Denisha McCauley